Here are some brilliant answers to questions on Insurance Claim forms. They are mostly taken from Jasper Carrot’s Insurance Claim sketch.
10. The guy was all over the place. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
9. I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.
8. I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought.
7. I had been driving for over forty years, when I fell asleep behind the wheel of my car.
6. I pulled over to the side of the road with smoke coming from under the bonnet. I realised the car was on fire. So took my dog out of the car and smothered it with a blanket.
5. On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke.
4. The car in front hit a man crossing the road, but he got up, so I hit him again.
3. A pedestrian hit me and went under my car
2. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull.
1. I bumped into a lamp-post which was obscured by human beings.